Life is meaningful when you spend it doing things that are exciting and meaningful to you. And when you spend it with people who are meaningful to you. Consider how much of your time is spent doing things that are meaningful to you or with those people who mean the most to you.
There’s a quote by Bob Goff that states, “The battle for our hearts is fought on the pages of our calendar”. Think about that for a moment and consider what story your calendar would tell? If you made a list of all the things that mattered most to you and compared that list to how you spend your time would they align?
We all want to spend our time on what matters most to us (our family, our health, our friendships and our dreams). The problem is that we are trying to fit them into an already over committed schedule. Then the things that matter most end up at the bottom of the priority list. They take a backseat to everything else we’ve said yes to.
What if you build your life around what you love instead of trying to fit what you love into your life?
You've probably heard the Big Rocks concept. If you fill a bucket with a bunch of small rocks and pebbles, you might not be able to fit big rocks into the bucket. If you start by putting the big rocks in first, you can fit small rocks, pebbles and even some water around those big rocks. Well imagine that bucket is your calendar and your big rocks are those things that matter most to you. The pebbles and water is everything else that takes your time like scrolling social media, watching Netflix or other people’s priorities.
What do you generally put in your bucket first? The big rocks or the little ones? What does your calendar tell you?
This is something I have to pay close attention to in my own life as a mom. It’s really easy for me to fill my time with small rocks like laundry, dishes, or cleaning up after my kids. I have to be intentional about prioritizing the big rocks in my life connecting with my husband or focusing on my business. When I take this approach with my time, I often find that there isn’t room for those big rocks.
If you are struggling to find time or energy for the things you love, try dumping out your bucket and rearranging the rocks. In other words, change your approach.
3 Steps to Rearrange Your Bucket:
#1 - Make a list of your BIG ROCKS. You can’t prioritize them if you don’t know what your big rocks are. This free Values Worksheet is a great starting point if you need help identifying your big rocks and what matters most to you. Once you know what your Big Rocks are, write out why that rock is important to you.
#2 - Evaluate how you spend your time. Map out your small rocks - everything that you devote time to. Identify items you will say no to. Consider whether you have room in your bucket for those small rocks.
#3 - Determine what action you want to take. Now that you know what’s important to you, consider how you’ll use this new awareness to make changes in your life. How will you take action to align your calendar with your heart?
Keep in mind that your big rocks will change over time and it’s possible you might fall back into old habits. Revisit these steps as often as you want to realign your focus.
Stop giving your family and your dreams your leftover time. Instead, build your life around the things you love and let the priorities of others fit in between. It takes practice but the more you say yes to the things that matter in your life, the more joyful and meaningful it will be.
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Hi! I’m Crystalynn, a mom of two and a certified coach. I help moms on the brink of burnout to manage their stress, regain balance in their lives, and develop the skills and strategies they need to thrive as parents and individuals. This Big Rocks strategy is just one that I use with my Mom coaching clients to help them prioritize what matters most to them. If you want to learn more about how you might benefit from private coaching, schedule a free session. For more tips on living with more intention and less stress, follow me on Instagram.